COMPUTER FOUL-UPS SOFTWARE is proud to present its complete line of software for today's world:

Continuing with Kurtz and Kemeny's wonderful saga, and taking into account the new programming directives, we present the powerful Object Oriented BASIC.
Includes the new reserved word RandomGoto.

I'm Not Even There -2.0
Our infamous programmable word processor with an entire PILOT system inside it, has been completely remodeled. A dictionary with 300000 Etruscan words has been added (it includes technical vocabulary and proper names) as well as a grammar checker: never make another error in Etruscan!

This Is A WorkShit
New electronic spreadsheet, written in LOGO. Is totally lacking in cell handling, formula handling, access to secondary memory as well as a decent and relatively fast user interface.

Lousy Painter
The superb drawing program that lets you do whatever you want to do. The only restrictions are the user's imagination, the fixed 25x40 resolution and its two colors (including background).

Guess The Number
This has been given the worst selling game award during ten consecutive years. Written in Z80 ML. Impossible to fix bugs come as a bonus with the special "PAY 1 TAKE 7" offer.

NEW! Guess The Number for Windows
The same fun and wholesome entertainment in a graphic environment. Take advantage of MS-Windows' multitasking capability to play several Guess The Number simultaneously!

Bike Simulator
Feel as if you were riding on a bicycle with training wheels with this unique concept simulator: there is only text (graphics, what for?).

Scared Stiff
Interactive game based on the famous film of the same title. The player may choose either Jerry Lewis' or Dean Martin's character.

The Wizard of Nabla
Advanced Calculus tutor. Easy to learn since all 25 lessons are exactly the same.

_Wait For Ever NET_ is the slowest network handler in this universe (and six more). It is incompatible with all other network handlers and protocols and is very user unfriendly.

Disk RAZY/Prog/RAM
Hard disk fragmenter. Loses information automatically at time intervals NOT specified by the user.

Virus Construction Set 2.1
Now larger and worse than ever. This new version includes hardware, software and electric current independence (perfect for very big networks). Includes 67 unstoppable crazy viruses to demonstrate its horrendous capacities.

Are you a frequent user of functional programming languages? Do you know parentheses? Are they a pain in the neck for you? If that's the case, No More Idiot Parentheses is for you! It works as an ordinary LISP interpreter, but instead of those hateful "(" and ")" it uses curly brackets!
Includes a file conversion utility.

Perfect ADAM/COLECO emulator. It is already available for TI-99/4A and Mattel Aquarius; it will soon be on the market for TRS-80, Apple III, Sinclair ZX80 and Commodore B700.

Computers Heuristic Algorithmic Operating System
This revolutionary operating system is available for all computers, from a lousy PC XT up to a powerful HAL9000 (that explains a lot of things), and is totally portable among all of them.
Among many other things it features:

Store and classify all important information so that it can be retrieved by just wishing to do so with this database system based on a new and powerful algorithm that gives its name to the program.

CENTIPEDE II: The Revenge Of The Bugs
Do you remember the unending hours of entertainment (and hand cramps) when you played CENTIPEDE and killed insects with a space ship? Good!
Now you have the opportunity to play from the other point of view and dedicate hours to destroying space ships with an insect: fun up to the limit of the unimaginable!

Are you tired of Macintosh text editors with their damn menus, windows and easy use? MarVIn is a complete vi emulator for your Macintosh. It is as cryptic as the original (and even more so). Obviously it completely ignores the mouse, and if your computer is running System 6 with MultiFinder or System 7, it will not let you change to a different application until you have finished with the current one (multitasking, what for?).

Testament Maker
Now making your last will and testament is easier than ever! This program lets you keep your testament up-to-date with abysmal ease - you can even use it to maintain an inventory of your belongings and a hate list of colleagues and relatives. It has an option to encrypt your testament so that only you can read and modify it.

New MUDs
Are you bored with LPMUD, DikuMUD and other combat oriented MUDs (combat, discover new places, combat, buy weapons, combat, kill monsters, combat, gain experience, combat, etc.)? Have TinyMUDs put you to sleep more than once (chat, gain experience, chat, discover new places, chat, etc.)?
Then this is for you: MUDs oriented to card games. This original concept will give years of renewed enthusiasm to MUD fans and to InterNet!!
The variants already on sale are BridgeMUD, CariocaMUD, PokerMUD, MusMUD and BlackJackMUCK. Will soon be on the market CanastaMUD, TongeMUD, SolitaireMUD (this one's going to be really interactive) and Crazy8MUD.

Tahur and Gambler
These client programs, compatible with all of the above MUDs, are also available; versions for ITS and VM/CMS are ready now. Versions for MULTICS and TOPS-20 are being prepared.

To make your purchase, call us at 1-800-FOULUPS.
Payment: we only accept blank checks payable to secret Swiss accounts. We send our programs on 3.25" diskettes, except for the MUDs and the client programs: in this case we send the INTERCAL source code via UseNet in alt.foulups.publishes-a-mud.

Miguel Farah